It was a call I was not expecting. I don’t think any of us were. But nonetheless I knew exactly what it meant: packing up the car and setting out on a whirlwind trip to Kansas. And the reality of it didn’t sink in until the visitation, when I saw my Grandma lying so still, so smile-less. I think that may have been the longest I’d ever seen her face without her sweet smile, or hearing her sugary “Hm-hmm” chuckle (yes, just like the Pilsbury Dough Boy).
It’s hard to fight the “if-only” thoughts in moments like that. If only I had given her one more hug the last time I saw her…. If only I had sent her more pictures of Kaeta… If only I had called her on Mother’s Day…. If only we had made the trip to Kansas sooner, so that Kaeta could have met her Great-Grandma Berniece. I take comfort, though, in the realization that someday Kaeta will get to meet her and I will get to hug her again, though maybe not for a while. In the meantime, she will be sorely missed.
We had another girl’s name in mind when Kaeta was born, but I have absolutely no regrets about naming her Kaeta Bernice, after her Great-Grandma (her first name was Katherine, so they are both K. Berniece, just spelled differently). Grandma was without a doubt one of the sweetest, most loving people I’ve ever met. The thing I remember best about her is that smile of hers, and how she was always ready to drop anything for a hug. Hers is a legacy of love and thoughtfulness that I pray will live on through my daughter. Who knows, maybe someday there will be another K. Berniece in the family.
Dear family and friends, I invite you to share your best memories of Grandma here in the comments. What will you miss the most about her? Got any good stories to tell?
