{"id":99,"date":"2006-10-26T12:44:00","date_gmt":"2006-10-26T12:44:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/?p=99"},"modified":"2006-10-26T12:44:00","modified_gmt":"2006-10-26T12:44:00","slug":"things-i-was-assaulted-with-while_26","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/2006\/10\/26\/things-i-was-assaulted-with-while_26\/","title":{"rendered":"Things I was assaulted with while trying to take a nap on the couch yesterday evening"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul><\/p>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">A cell phone.<\/span> Placed on top of the couch to keep out of reach of baby.  Fell on me.\n<li><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">A small pumpkin.<\/span>  Same deal as the cell phone.\n<li><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">A singing robot dog.<\/span>  Flung into face (while asleep, mind you!) by baby.  It was singing &#8220;Do Your Ears Hang Low?&#8221; at maximum volume (I&#8217;ve learned to sleep through a lot this year).\n<li><span style=\"font-weight:bold;\">Magnetic cookies.<\/span>  This is some kind of toy.  It does not belong in Daddy&#8217;s face.\n<\/ul>\n<p>I love being a dad!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A cell phone. Placed on top of the couch to keep out of reach of baby. Fell on me. A small pumpkin. Same deal as the cell phone. A singing robot dog. Flung into face (while asleep, mind you!) by baby. It was singing &#8220;Do Your Ears Hang Low?&#8221; at maximum volume (I&#8217;ve learned to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-99","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=99"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=99"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=99"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thekurths.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=99"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}